Who you gonna call?
by spiffytgm
Summary: There's a new movie being filmed in New York City. Is there a place for Plum? Babe HEA


**This is for Lynda, so there! ;-) (Okay, I didn't really have a long intro for this... Lynda posted a picture of the New Ghostbusters on Facebook, and my mind started to wander.)**

 **All characters belong to JE, all mistakes are mine.**

Since when do stoners run so fast? Jimmy Thompson was picked up for possession of marijuana, not speed. How was I supposed to know that the skinny little weasel was fresh off the high school track team? I chased him down the street and around the Shop N Bag before he hip-checked me off the loading dock and straight into the dumpster.

I poked my head above the top of the Dumpster, but Jimmy was long gone. In his place was a slightly pudgy middle aged man who had the look of an eager puppy. He reminded me of my brother in law Albert Kloughn a little bit. I peeled a leaf of half rotten lettuce off my head and tried not to snarl at the guy. "Is there something I can help you with?"

He was practically bouncing as he walked over and held out his hand. "Bob Schaffer, Central Casting. That was amazing."

I wiped the tomato off my hand and let him help me out of the dumpster. "Stephanie Plum, bond enforcement agent. Unfortunately, I'm used to this by now."

Once I was out, he looked at his now red smeared hand. "Amazing." If he thought that was good, I figured he'd stroke out if he ever saw my follow up act. He shook his head again. "Have you ever thought about a career change?"

I looked him up and down. "Sorry, pal. I'm not that kind of girl."

His eyes bugged out a little and his jaw dropped. If I wasn't currently covered in grocery store dumpster remains, I might have laughed. He held up his hands. "That's not what I meant. I'm a casting director and I thought you'd be perfect for a role."

Before I could ask him what the hell he was talking about, my phone rang. It was Ranger with the icing on my cake for the day. "Babe, you just went offline again."

"Son of a Bitch!" I yelled into the phone. "That's the second car this month!" It had been an old rusted out Crown Vic, but it was all I could afford at the moment. Now I was going to have to borrow Big Blue from Grandma Mazur again.

"Babe," Ranger chuckled, "I'll meet you over at the bonds office with a loaner." I would have argued with him, but he had already hung up on me. Would it kill him to say goodbye once in a while?

I looked at Bob who was holding out a card for me. He still had a goofy smile plastered on his face. I took the card and he said, "If you're interested in being in a movie, be at this address tomorrow at 10:00. You really should come, you'd be perfect for it!"

When Bob left, I looked at the card for Central Casting. The address was in midtown Manhattan. At least it probably wasn't porn, but I wasn't interested. I put the card in my pocket and schlepped towards the office, waving at the usual assortment of cops and firefighters dousing the flames of my next disaster. My sneakers made squishing noises with each step I took, and the heat wasn't doing me any favors.

When I got back to the office, Ranger was waiting outside for me, leaning against the side of one of the fleet vehicles. He got one whiff of me and for the first time ever, took a step back. I could feel tears threaten. "Is it that bad?"

The corner of his mouth lifted, like he was thinking about smiling. "Babe, let me see if Cal has some garbage bags in his car to spread over your seat."

While they were busy disaster proofing the car, I walked inside to grab my purse. I had left it in Lula's car when we went to get Jimmy. Both Connie and Lula looked at me with equal expressions of horror. I just shook my head slowly. "It's produce day at the Shop N Bag dumpster."

Lula put her hand on her hip and just looked at me. "Girl, don't you think this shit's getting a little old?"

I glared at her. "What else am I going to do? I like my job, I set my own hours, and 75% of the time, I'm not covered in garbage. I have no other job prospects that I'm aware of." Then I remembered the card in my pocket. I pulled it out and waved it around. "Except for an acting job, which if I showed up, would probably be porn."

Lula snatched the card from my hand. She looked at it, then handed it to Connie. "Girl, this is from Central Casting. They ain't no porn outfit, this here's a legitimate business. They want to give you an acting job?"

I ran my hand through my hair and immediately regretted it. "I don't know. Some guy that saw my chase Jimmy gave me the card and told me that he had the perfect part for me. He told me to show up at that address tomorrow at 10:00 if I was interested."

Lula was bouncing up and down in excitement. She was really testing the limits of her hot pink spandex top. "Hell yeah, we're going! I'll pick you up at your apartment at 8:30 and we'll drive in together. If they want a skinny thing like you, I'm sure they have a part for a big, beautiful woman like me."

Connie turned her screen so that I could see it without getting too close. "She's right, they're legit. It looks like they provide background actors for movies and TV shows."

Maybe it wouldn't be a bad idea to check it out. I looked at Lula. "I'll see you tomorrow morning at 8:30." I grabbed my purse and walked out. Ranger was still waiting for me. "You sure you want me to drive that in this condition?"

He got close enough that he was almost touching me. The heat of his body made me shiver. He tilted my head up and kissed me softly on the lips, making sure not to touch any other part of me. "Babe."

I looked down. "It's not my fault."

He chuckled. "It never is. Want me to bring you dinner?"

I agreed and drove home to get cleaned up and burn my clothes. I was never going to get the smell of rotting vegetables out of them anyway.

o0()0o

Ranger was gone by the time Lula showed up the next morning wearing the gold spandex she bought when we had the ad on the bus. I told him last night what we were doing, and he seemed amused. When we got on the Jersey Turnpike, I noticed the black SUV following us up the road, so I called him. "Babe."

"Don't you 'Babe' me, who do I have tailing me to New York?"

"Binkie and Les."

Unh. I did a mental head slap. "I don't even know if this is a legitimate acting job, and besides, Lula is with me and I'm not going after a skip. I don't need an entourage."

I could feel his grin over the phone line. "Humor me, please? You're going to be too far away for me to get to you if you're in trouble."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm going to Manhattan. How much trouble can I get into?" I slapped my hand over my mouth. This was me we were talking about, there is no end to the amount of trouble I can get into. Lula was laughing hysterically next to me. I huffed, "Fine," into the phone and ended the call.

Bob looked surprised by the group following me, but he took it well. I guess he was used to working with oddball actors who showed up everywhere with bodyguards. He talked to me about how long filming would take and sent me to another guy to have head shots taken. After a couple of phone calls he said to me, "Congratulations, you got the part. You start filming on Monday." He gave me a contract to read over, sign, and fax back. He also gave me a call sheet telling me when and where to show up. He even got Lula a part as a background person.

As we were walking out the door, I said, "You never even told me what the film is about. How do I know this is something I want to do?"

He tilted his head. "I didn't tell you? Sorry, it must have slipped my mind. Sony Pictures is doing a remake of Ghostbusters with a female cast. The girl playing your role broke her arm and we needed someone quick to fill in for her." I didn't hear anything after Ghostbusters, and luckily Les was there to catch me before I hit the floor."

Ranger explained the contract to me. For a really outrageous sum of money, I was going to be filming for four days. I didn't have any lines, but I did have to do a minor stunt. I almost peed in excitement when he told me that I would get screen credit. The downside was that I couldn't tell anybody what we were filming until the movie was released, there was a non-disclosure clause in the contract.

o0()0o

On Monday, we had to go into the wardrobe trailer so that they could be sure we were dressed appropriately. Lula was very disappointed when she was told to wear pants and a colored shirt with no advertising on it, but I thought she looked great. Hanging just inside the door were the four Ghostbuster overalls that the stars would be wearing for the shoot. I stared in open-mouthed awe.

After everyone was approved, we were lined up on both sides of the road and told to cheer when the car drove up. I pushed my way to the curb and screamed like a madwoman when the Ecto-1 drove by. This was by far the best day of my life.

Thursday was my last day of filming. I was a little bummed that I never got to see any of the stars close up, but I've spent the last three days living in a dream. Today we were filming my scene. I've spent the past two days practicing with the stunt coordinator until he was comfortable letting me film my stunt. Lula got to wear her regular clothes today, since she was playing the part of a hooker that had snuck behind a building with her friends to smoke.

I was bouncing up and down with excitement when the second unit director yelled "Action". My scene was flawless. I ran down the middle of the street, looked over my shoulder, ran around the side of a building and jumped in a dumpster. Given all my real life experience in this area, the stunt was a snap. As I crouched in the dumpster waiting for him to yell "Cut", I heard something wet splash against the side. Finally, the cut was called, and I lifted the lid to climb out. What I saw was hysterical. Apparently, once I jumped in and the lid closed, a "ghost" passed by, and they splashed all the extras with green slime. Lula didn't think it was nearly as funny as I did since she was standing right next to the dumpster.

When I got home there was a message from Bob, inviting me to the cast party and telling me that any time I wanted to work, he'd set me up. As I hit the delete button, I felt a strong pair of arms wrap around me, enveloping me in the scent of Bulgari and Ranger. He kissed the top of my head and said, "Thinking about a career change, Babe?"

I spun around and laid my head on his chest. "This was the best week ever, but this is where I belong. I missed seeing you all the time."

He tilted my chin up and gave me a proper kiss hello. When he pulled away, he gave me a two hundred watt smile and looked around my apartment. "This isn't exactly where you belong, Babe." I'm sure my confusion was showing, because he laughed a little, too. "I missed you too, Babe, but you won't be right where you belong until you move in with me."

"M...move in?"

He squeezed me tighter. "Yes, Babe. I'm ready to start our Someday if you are."

I got a glint in my eye. "Are you sure this city isn't headed for a disaster of biblical proportions?"

He chuckled. "What do you mean biblical?"

I joined him. "What I means is Old Testament, Mr. Mayor, real wrath of God type stuff. Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling! Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes..."

"The dead rising from the grave?"

" Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!"

"All right, all right! I get the point!" He kissed my forehead and I giggled until it was out of my system. Sometimes he really gets me. Once I calmed down, he continued, "None of that stuff, Babe, just you and me."

I looked around the apartment that held so many memories for me, both good and bad. I realized that the best memories all involved the man standing here, holding me. I realized that I was ready for anything as long as I was with him. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around him. "Let's do it!"


End file.
